Doctor Bonnie

After Sen. John Edwards revealed his affair to his wife – prior to the information becoming public knowledge, and we at least have to give him SOME credit for being honest with her - she said she was (obviously) upset, but decided to stick it out with her husband “for the kids.”

This is something we hear a lot  - and something I see a lot when talking to couples who are contemplating divorce or who have gone through an affair situation. The truth is, people rarely stay together just for the kids. People stay with the cheating spouse/partner because deep down they want to make it work and they believe they CAN get to the bottom of the situation, and work through it. These are valuable sentiments to acknowledge and important in beginning to re-build the relationship, if that’s what the couple chooses to do.

The affair usually comes as a wake-up call to both parties involved. It’s a (rather obvious!) sign that they’re struggling with something else, whether it be a fear of loss – as sees to be the situation in the case of the Edwards’ – dealing with stress – also a possible factor – or even a means of revenge for something else going on in the relationship. Whatever the reason, it’s an obvious turning point and one that can be negotiated around when the couple is willing to get to the bottom of their emotions.

This entry was posted Thursday, August 28th, 2008 at 10:57 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.